Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Self-Confidence - So Difficult to Develop Yet So Important

It is sometimes so difficult to instill self-confidence in your adolescents. The media and society isn't always kind to them. They are never good enough and because of this it falls to the parents to make sure that your adolescent is brought up in a balanced and happy environment that can foster self-confidence.

To instill self-confidence in your adolescent can be an uphill battle. Parents must take the time to listen and to spend quality time with their adolescents. But you can bring up a self-confident and happy adolescent by following these tips.

1. Know your adolescent. Each adolescent has a different level of experience and needs different types of encouragement.Some adolescents may be naturally quiet and feel much more comfortable talking to you after they have thought about the problem or situation first themselves. Other adolescents want to talk to you while they are trying to solve a problem or to get perspective on a situation. One of the most important things to remember is that if your adolescent wants to talk to you that you let him/her talk without interrupting until (s)he is finished. That will show your adolescent that you care and respect him/her regardless of his/her views or take on a situation. Parents must learn to just listen empathetically.

2. Treat your adolescent with respect at all times.Your adolescent has valid opinions and has rights as a human being. You should honour these opinions and feelings and not write them off because your adolescent is uttering them. You should communicate, listen and show your adolescent unconditional love by being empathic and allowing your adolescent to express any emotions that (s)he may have. Pent up emotions can fester over time, making your adolescent quite uncertain of him/herself.

3. Give your adolescent unconditional love and support.A parent's love should not be dependent on circumstances or if your adolescent does something right. Instead, your adolescent should always be supported, and this is especially the case if (s)he does something wrong or gets into trouble. It is very difficult for your adolescent to feel good about him/herself is you criticize your adolescent all the time. So, try to be as positive as possible with your adolescent.

4. Accept and honour your adolescent's feelings at all times.Your teenager will feel a variety of feelings during adolescence. That is part of the work of growing up. Adolescence is also a time of vulnerability and uncertainty for your teenager. So, it is important to be as positive as possible with your adolescent in order to show him/her that you really care. Most importantly, if your teenager is uncertain about his/her feelings or a particular situation, it is important to accept his/her feelings (even if we don't agree with them) and to honour them unconditionally. This will help your adolescent feel valuable and loved which are two important ways of building self-esteem.

So, do your adolescent a favour. Treat your adolescent with the respect that (s)he deserves so that (s)he can life a happy and self-confident life. There is nothing better than helping your adolescent be a happy and fulfilled! Unconditional love and patience helps to make this happen.


Irene S. Roth is a freelance writer for kids and teens. She is also an academic writer and writes in the areas of philosophy and philosophical psychology. She is currently pursuing her doctorate in philosophy and writes in the area of medical ethics.


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